I am coming to the conclusion that the Church that Christ is building
is something quite different than what we have been taught.
I can recall studying the "5 fold ministry" while in Bible collage. At
the time we were taught that those five ingredients are what make up
the Church. Where Apostles, Prophets, Evangelists, Pastors and Teachers
are functioning together; there is Church.
Rather than understand that particular verse to mean that these things
will exist in the Body of Christ world wide, we have foolishly
interpreted it to mean they must exist "underneath one roof". I've even
seen Churches advertise that they have the "5 fold ministry" in an
effort to draw a larger congregation. There are articles and books
written on whether or not these five things are working in today's
Churches. When we build a new Church great time and attention is put
into making sure that all the necessary ingredients are present when
the doors open. The theory is that if we have an Apostle, a Prophet, an
Evangelist, a Pastor and a teacher all within our congregation, we will
have everything we need to "do Church". It's very much like opening
your own McDonalds or Jack in the Box. Once everyone is in place, it's
time for business. You need an owner, a manager, an assistant manager,
a fleet of workers and you're good to go.
About two years ago I started taking a close look at my life and the
lives of people around me. Everyone I know has their own personal
circle of friends they hang out with. It may consist of family members,
people from work, school, internet or their neighborhood. Every person
I know has their "Inner Circle". It usually consists of between 5 to 10 people. They have other friends as well, but those people wouldn't be considered "Inner Circle" friends.
To be an "Inner Circle" friend, there just has to
be something that causes a mutual connection between the two of you.
There is no recipe for it, and one can never predict when it's going to
happen. You can't force it, plan it, cultivate it or even command it to
take place; it literally blooms totally on its own. I have found that
only certain people can "jell" together on a level of deepness that is
not necessarily shared with others. It's almost as though they were
made specifically with the other person in mind. In a realm only known
to God Himself, these people fit together like pieces of a puzzle. In
fact, I believe that they were brought together by the Holy Spirit.
Only He sees the inner structure of each individual soul and then finds
another soul to connect snug and tight. It's unexplainable and cannot
be manufactured or re-created by human hands in a million years.
I have an "Inner Circle" of about 10 people. These are folks that I'm
super close with. Our connection didn't happen in an effort to fulfill
some Christian obligation to meet together and perform relati
onship
once a week. We all connect because we fit. We knew it the moment we
first met. I have many other friends that I absolutely adore and love
spending time with. I'd even die for them. They mean the world to me;
however they are not in my "Inner Circle".
My four year old daughter brought out a "Hello Kitty" 100 piece
jigsaw puzzle the other day and asked me to help her put it together.
The box said that it was for ages 6 and up so I knew it wasn't going to
come together without my help. As we were laying out the pieces and
turning them all picture side up, my daughter started screaming with
excitement. She had found two pieces that fit perfectly. The problem
was that though they fit, they didn't go. The picture didn't come
together. As I took a closer look at all the puzzle pieces I was
surprised to find that many of them were the exact same shape. This is
confusing for a four year old girl. All she is thinking about is
getting the pieces to fit. She is two young to understand that there is
a bigger picture being formed when all the pieces are in their proper
place.
When man kind sets out to "build a Church" we are very much like my 4 year old daughter. We think that "fitting pieces together" is what it's all about. It's ironic that man would even set out to build Church when Christ Himself said "I will build my Church". Only He has the blueprints and the final picture. The most we can do to build a
Church is snap two pieces together that fit, but have nothing to do
with each other when it come to the big picture. That is exactly what I
see happening in the Institutional churches across America. They try
and try with all their might to dictate and orchestrate relationship on their terms, and they do it all in the Name of Jesus. It's no wonder
the Body of Christ today resembles a Mr. Potato Head that was put
together by a deaf, dumb, and blind 4 year old. There's an arm sticking
out of the eye socket, the lips are where the ears go and the eyes are
on top of the head. It's a mess.
If a "men's accountability group" is meeting every Tuesday night
at 7:00, YOU NEED TO BE THERE!!!!!! We are told that every man needs to
come and connect with all the other men because they need that
accountability. The problem is that the pieces don't go together just
because they say so. A room full of men does not equal pieces that fit.
Even if they are all Christian men who know the Lord well! You can
manipulate and obligate these men to "go together" all you want, but it
won't work. We have been taught if we are Christians, we should all fit
together with that "Inner Circle" type of intimacy. WRONG!!! Jerry and Todd may both love the Lord and be
brothers in His Name, but neither of them were made to be put together.
YES they are a part of the same picture, but they were never intended
to connect with an "Inner Circle" connection.
The sad thing is that Jerry is told over and over by his group leader
or his Pastor that he needs to connect with Todd out of Christian love.
So Jerry tries with all his heart to make that connection. He secretly
beats himself up and feels condemned because it's just not happening.
He starts to feel rebellious, and eventually wonders if he has the Love
of God in him at all. Each week he reluctantly shows up to the men's
meeting and makes small talk while glancing at his watch and wishing he
was somewhere else. All the while, his leader keeps complaining to the
group because he doesn't see the men connecting and talking as deeply
as he thinks they should. (This is the story of almost every men's meeting in America)
I honestly think we try to "build the Church" because when
push comes to shove; we really don't believe there is a Jesus Christ at
all. We can't see Him with our eyes and we can't hear Him with our
ears, so it makes it pretty difficult to just sit back and let Him
build the Church. We jump in and do it because we don't believe in Him.
Think about it. I am also convinced that this is why we start "Discipleship Groups" in our Churches. We honestly don't believe there is a Jesus. We feel
that it's our job to disciple young Christians instead of just turning
them over to Christ. I thought He wanted us to make "Disciples of
Christ"? Why then are we intent on making people our disciples? Where
in the Bible does it say that WE are supposed to disciple people? We do
this because we don't believe there IS a Jesus.
If I disciple Jim and Jim disciples Tony and Tony disciples Greg and
Greg disciples Brian; who disciples me? Who disciples the guy who
disciples me?? Eventually won't it lead to Christ? Can't we just go
directly to Him or do we really need another mediator? (More on this
subject at another time)
So where is the Church that Christ is building???
It's your "Inner Circle" of friends. He is the one who brought you together. Not only do you "fit" with these people but you "go together" with them. You fit together in the big picture!!! Your close friends ARE the Church that Christ built. If you look within your "Inner Circle" you will find diverse personalities. One has the personality of an
Apostle, one is a Prophet, one is an Evangelist, one is a Pastor and
one is a Teacher. Everyone I know has the 5 fold ministry built into
their "Inner Circle" of friends!
The problem is that we leave that inner circle on Sunday morning and "go to Church".
We spend hours trying to pour our hearts into fitting pieces together
that have nothing to do with the original blueprints. We focus our time
and attention on building the synthetic church while we neglect the
actual Church that He as already built into our lives. I hear people
say to me that they need to "go to Church" because they need to
find Christian people to connect with. My advice to them is that they
spend their time deepening the connections they already have in their
life. I believe that everything we need exists within our "Inner Circle" of friends. All we need to do is press in even deeper to those people
that God has built into our lives. Those are the relationships that
came from Heaven. Those are the relationships we need to spend our time
and focus on. Those relationships ARE the Church that Christ built!
I know this is somewhat late, but re-reading this article has caused me to think even more about it. I really think you have a good point or two here, Darin, I'm 'required' in the organisation I work in to be accountable to a team (all to each other) for 'pastoral purposes', but none of them are who I'd choose to share my inner life with. Not necessarily because there's anything wrong with them, but they're not my inner circle friends who I know love me just because time, suffering, laughter, companionship, even disagreement - and more - have all contributed to make us close. They are people I can grow old with. AND we have a variety of gifts that we all use and turn to each other for,when needed, mostly unconsciously. This makes such good sense to me, thanks.
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Great article...I thoroughly agree with everything you said. However...just wondering how to make this applicable in the lives of people who have no "inner circle". My husband and I have been life long "church" attenders and always in one ministry or another. If you were to ask anyone at our church how they feel about us I'm positive they would say they are fond of us. Yet after all these years we have never experienced an inner circle. I used to blame us for the lack of deep friendships, but after much prayer and consideration I truly believe we are as God would have us to be. I'm sure there must be other people who are waiting to experience the joy of an "inner circle". When the Christians around you treat church like a social club how do we ever find it?
This is a great article, Darin! It's so awesome just to hear you explain how you see the "Church of Christ of the Inner Circle" naturally happening in your life. It helps explain some of why I felt relationships never really fit or were right in the institutional church environment.
This question with the disciple-chain was one I asked myself too, before leaving the institution of church. We had this system where you go to a smallgroup and you are somehow supposed to lead a smallgroup. So you would have a mentor and be a mentor for someone else. Some thought I had while thinking about all of this again lately was: Isnt it the same with the Pope? There is always the one who is on the top of the pyramide...who has no mentor but Christ only. And this person is not very different then the Pope, if we where supposed to live in this mentoring-system. Since I left the IC,there is developing some kind of inner circle. There are more friends then before and they are closer to me. Not too close yet, but I think this will come. Its interesting.